Today's Big Stuff 11.22.21

November 22, 2021

11.22.21

It’s Monday. There are 351 days until the midterm elections. A late congrats to House Democrats, Biden might actually finally be doing something about DeJoy and that time America got smarter… for about 85 minutes.

Be advised: We’re in a mood today so we’re cussing a lot and spelling all kinds of shit wrang.

Note: Hey there, sexy patriots!!!! Did y’all get sexier? More patriotic? Both? Well whatever you’ve done in the three days since we seen ya, it’s working. Why are we in such a good mood today? It’s a fair question. Because there’s really zero reason for any of us to be in a good mood right now. You got a pandemic that won’t go away, assholes who don’t want the pandemic to go away, a democracy that has about five minutes left to live and oh yeah we’re living in the golden age of the bloodthirsty mediocre white guy psychopath.

That last one has us especially rattled. What we saw on Jan. 6 was just a taste, and we don’t know about y’all but watching all those limp-dick freaks cheering for Kyle Rittenhouse last week really freaked us the fuck out. It sure seems like we’re on a path to a place where the next Republican nominee to be president is openly bragging about how many people he’s killed. So both Trump and DeSantis would have a lot to say. We really wish there was like some spray we could invent to keep these jerks away from us decent people. We could call it Jerk Off. Wait. Maybe not.

So yeah, things are good and truly fucked up. So what in the hell are we grinning about? Well, you. When we start to worry too much or when we’ve cussed at the sky so much our throats are scratchy and bleeding, we remember that there is one great reason to be hopeful — you. We know you’re out there giving a shit, we know you’re out there being hot as all hell, we know you’re out there organizing and giving and paying attention and voting and fighting back. And knowing you’re out there gives us hope, and some days, hope is the most important thing you can have. So as we kick off turkey week, we want to start by saying we’re thankful for you, sexy patriots. Thanks for keeping us hopeful. And thanks for cussing at the sky with us. Have a great Monday.

Note two: Hey btw, thanks for letting us take an extra day off last Friday. This week we’re planning to publish today, Tuesday and Wednesday and then we’ll take it easy and meet back here next Monday. As always, if you need some cuss words during those days off, just shoot us a note and we’ll be happy to fucking oblige.

Note three: News just broke that President Biden is going to renominate Powell to be the Fed chairman. We’ve stayed out of this fight because we got other shit going on, but we sure as hell would’ve listened to Elizabeth Warren on this one instead.

Note four: Congrats to Vermont’s Peter Welch, who announced this morning he is running to fill Sen. Patrick Leahy’s seat. Good luck! More: Associated Press

Note five: This story says that CBS’s Marge Brennan “shut down” Ted Cruz’s lies about the 2020 election. That is sure as shit not what happened. What happened is that CBS gave a known liar a platform and then Brennan got rolled by that liar over and over again. It is truly astonishing what absolute right-wing garbage CBSNews has become. More: Huff Post

Note six: Y’all get your boosters yet? We’re picking up Disney+ through our dental fillings since we got boosted. So go ahead and please get it done. More: New York Times

Note seven: This says we’re a backsliding democracy. Yeah, no fucking shit. What gave it away? The orange fascist asshole who tried to overthrow the government? More: The Guardian

Note eight: We’ve basically stopped getting our hopes up that Trump is ever going to face any real accountability, but then we see a story like this and we wonder if maybe some day we’ll just wake up and the rule of law will actually mean something. More: Washington Post

Note nine: People need to go to jail over this shit. We need to make an example. Y’all think Merrick Garland is up to it? More: Washington Post

Note 10: Want to be filled with rage and despair this fine Monday? Then read this story about how much Republican donors love Kyrsten Sinema and Joe Manchin. What sleaze. More: New York Times

Note 11: And here’s just a bafflingly out of touch and pretentious Sinema saying she will not budge on the filibuster even if means voting rights are killed. Seriously, what sleaze. More: Washington Post

Note 12: We don’t know if y’all saw this shit in the Senate last week, but this must be some of the civility that Manchin and Sinema love so much. More: Washington Post

Note 13: Facebook is straight fucking evil. More: Washington Post

Note 14: We’d say Ann Arbor is living in the future, but this still seems late as hell. More: CNN

Note 15: Here’s a story about how the dumbest and most dangerous members of Congress are feeling empowered. Maybe we all just go back to bed and meet back here tomorrow. More: Washington Post

Note 16: Congrats to these two complete morons for finally realizing that Fox News is bad. You just know the rest of official Washington can’t wait to throw these assholes a fucking parade. More: New York Times

Note 17: Life is good in Russia when you’re a former Russian spy who successfully duped an entire political party. More: New York Times

Note 18: Do we have thoughts about President Biden running for re-election in 2024? No. No we fucking do not. More: Washington Post

Note 19: Republicans are probably going to take over elections in Wisconsin and Arizona and maybe Georgia. If you want to know what national Democrats are doing about it, so do we. More: Yahoo News

Note 20: Before we close the notes today, we just want to send actual thoughts and prayers to Waukesha, Wisc. We don’t know what happened yet, but that was fucking awful to see and we’re sending every good vibe we’ve got up that way. More: Associated Press

Note 21: Ok, sexy patriots, America is a fucking mess right now, so let’s get through this short week and try to be thankful for each other. And if that doesn’t work, let’s just be thankful for Dolly Parton. We love y’all and hope you have an awesome day.

Woohoo!

So while we were away, Kevin McCarthy tried to filibuster in the House and just pushed passage of the BBB bill into daylight hours on Friday. So congrats to House Democrats on doing their jobs and making life better for Americans. We can’t wait to see how Senate Democrats fuck it up. On a side note, special congratulations to Speaker Pelosi who just keeps showing everyone else how it’s done. More: New York Times

No DeJoy in Mudville

Holy fucking shit. It’s only taken a goddamn year but Joe Biden might actually be doing something about corrupt Trump crony and killer of the postal service, Louis DeJoy. Biden announced Friday he is nominating two new board members and getting rid of DeJoy’s Democratic allies. This needed to happen. Badly. More: NPR

History

Well, America, we did it. We finally made a woman president. For just less than an hour and a half. Yeah, while President Biden got his colonoscopy Friday, transferred power and authority to Vice President Harris. And for 85 glorious minutes, America was smarter and better run than it had ever been. Maybe we should try it again for longer. More: Washington Post

Today’s clips

A year after coronavirus vaccines dangled visions of an end to the pandemic, science has delivered inspiring results again: two antiviral pills that dramatically reduce the risk of hospitalization and death.

A member of the House select committee investigating the January 6 attack told CNN Saturday many of the more than 200 witnesses they have interviewed are former officials from the Trump administration who came forward voluntarily.

More: CNN

A federal judge suggested Friday that former President Donald Trump had some responsibility for the January 6 attack on the Capitol and that rioters were pawns provoked into action.

More: CNN

Support Today’s Big Stuff

If you have a friend, family member, or neighbor that would like to sign up for this free daily newsletter they can go to TodaysBigStuff.com.

Unlike a lot of soulless Washington newsletters, you won’t see us making out with defense contractors or oil companies for a little extra ad money. It’s gross as hell, and they won’t return our calls. Our goal is to keep Today’s Big Stuff free and available for anyone who needs a laugh during these trying times. But we need your help to do it.

Your donations help us cover the costs of distributing this newsletter and allow us to keep it pure, honest and foul-mouthed as a motherfucker.

So much of the media these days are pulling their punches and afraid to tell the truth because they don’t want to piss off their advertisers. Not us! Advertisers don’t want anything to do with us, and if they did, we would piss them off in like two seconds.

So please chip in what you can and let’s keep Today’s Big Stuff for the people! Make a contribution here.