8.29.23 WTF, Tennessee?

Be advised: This is a cussing newsletter. It’s partial to the s-word and the f-word but it also loves a good goddamn.

Note: Sexy Patriots! How the eff are you? Losing your shit over the endless madness, lies and hypocrisy? Cool! Us too! As a matter of fact, the only question we ask these days more than WHAT THE FUCK?! is ARE WE LOSING OUR GODDAMN MINDS?!

After asking and getting no good answers for many many years now, we decided to cut straight to the chase and go directly to the source. So here is an interview with our minds…

TBS: Um hi.

Our minds: Hey guys! Thanks for having us. Big fans!

TBS: Well sure but thanks. So, um, are we losing you?

OM: Fellas! You could never lose us! Well you could and you have a little here and there, but the reality is no you are not losing your minds and neither are the rest of the Sexy Patriots.

TBS: So why does it feel like we are?

OM: Well, you live in a country that is living under the threat of fascism where millions have already lost basic freedoms. The rule of law has barely held, both the media and law enforcement are compromised and there is more and more violence every day. That’s pretty scary shit and yet the world just keeps moving on like nothing is happening.

TBS: Totally. It’s like you’re reading our… oh right.

OM: But it’s completely normal to feel freaked the fuck out and feel like you’re the only one who is seeing all the scary shit that’s happening. But you’re not alone. Millions and millions of other people feel just like you do. And like you, they still have a thing or two to say about where this country is headed.

TBS: So we’re cool?

OM: Cooler than the other side of the pillow. You just care about your freedom and your country and other people. Nothing cooler than that. And that goes for all you SPs out there.

TBS: Ok well thanks, our minds.

OM: No problem! We’ll see you around!

Is it just us or our minds kinda corny? Also is that fake interview further proof of insanity or did we just totally prove how not insane we really are? Yeah, we’re gonna choose to believe it’s the latter. Y’all have a blessed day.

Note two: We swear to dog there was no LSD involved in the crafting of that opening note.

Note three: Did y’all see the Pope called out US right-wingers for being “backward?” The pope, y’all. That’s the same dude who put Galileo on trial and he’s calling out American Republicans for being dunces. Ok maybe not the same dude but you get our point. More: AP

Note four: Nothing says “Back to School in America” like a goddamn shooting. We weren’t always like this, were we? More: CBS

Note five: It’s worth pondering how far we’ve come. And how much we’ve lost in just the last few years.

Note six: The president met yesterday with civil rights leaders at the White House to commemorate the event and issue a stark warning following the racist murders in Jacksonville over the weekend. He didn’t praise many fine people on both sides. More: CNN

Note seven: VP Harris and Janet Yellen were promoting union labor yesterday by releasing a first-ever report that makes clear that unions are good for the economy and good for Americans. More: Reuters

Note eight: Eminem wants Vivek Ramaswamy to stop using his music. We just want Vivek Ramaswamy to stop. More: CNN

Note nine: Fox is spending lots and lots of time making accusations against Joe Biden that according to Fox are disinformation. That sure sounds like the network that had to fork over almost a billion dollars for lying to the nation. More: Media Matters

Note 10: This stupid shit makes us want to check in with our minds again.

Note 11: You might have seen that Mark Meadows surprised legal observers and testified in Georgia yesterday. He said under oath that he was only doing his job as chief-of-staff to the president when he took part in a coup attempt. If that’s true, it’s a fucked up job description. Also, it’s not true. More: CNN

Note 12: Joe the Plumber died. The entire media world kissed this dude’s ass while he was alive so we figure it’s covered. More: NPR

Note 13: You won’t believe this but that college that Ron DeSantis and his idiot friends took over isn’t doing too great. It’s almost like no one wants a degree in Racist Pudding Fingers-ology. More: CNN

Note 14: Oh and the Miami Herald takes a look at how DeSantis’s “education” team went looking for “opposing viewpoints” on slavery. Remember when we were told this was about parents’ rights? Yeah, we can guess which parents. More: Miami Herald (Paywall)

Note 15: This is what it looks like when your president is a good guy and not the kind of scumbag who gives a speech to the Boy Scouts that their leader then has to apologize for.

Note 16: The White House says it’s preparing for fall to deal with the rise in COVID cases. Can someone explain to us why they’re waiting and why they think pretending it’s already gone will make things better? The orange guy did that and it didn’t work out so good. More: Salamanca Press

Note 17: The people of Wisconsin spoke and said they wanted a liberal state Supreme Court. The right-wing trash who thought they owned that court aren’t taking it well. More: HuffPost

Note 18: We’ve seen a lot of people debating whether Ted Cruz is a soulless liar or a brainless goddamn moron. The answer is yes. More: HuffPost

Note 19: Let’s end on some good news. Amy Coney Barrett is welcoming scrutiny of Supreme Court Justices. And it’s not like that corrupt human garbage would lie to us, right? More: HuffPost

Note 20: And on that infuriating note, let’s go do some news! We hope y’all are having a great week so far. And if you feel like you’re losing your minds, just have a little chat with them. That will make everything better. Probably. Love y’all!

Plans for spring?

Yesterday Donald Trump got something Hillary, Obama and Biden never have — a court date. Yeah Orangey is scheduled to go to trial on March 4 of next year which is just one day before Super Tuesday. The right is furious that this is happening during an election year, and decent people are furious that the piece of shit who attacked our Capitol is running at all. Trump of course vowed to appeal the schedule which is kinda funny because there aren’t really many ways to appeal this kind of thing.

More: NBC

10 drugs

No, that's not a description of a crazy ass weekend. It’s what the IRA empowered Medicare to negotiate the cost of and today Dark Brandon rolled out the list. We’re talking blood thinners, diabetes medicines and at least one cancer treatment. This would mean lower drug prices for seniors beginning in 2026. But like anything that’s good for America and bad for faceless corporations, Republicans want to fuck this up too.

More: HuffPost

WTF, Tennessee?

Tennessee Republicans can’t stop and won’t stop showing their whole ass. After getting smacked by a judge for passing new rules that resulted in state troopers escorting out moms with paper signs, the state GOP once again decided it was time to shut up a Black man. Yeah, those new rules mean the majority can vote to silence a member for various bullshit reasons. So yesterday Justin Jones was voted down for going “off-topic” and the statehouse voted to silence him for the day. The people weren’t having that shit, so the Republicans cleared the gallery and all the Democrats walked out of the chamber. Look we’re not super surprised the state that gave us Marsha Blackburn is this fucked up, but this is getting ri-goddamn-diculous.

More: AP

Today’s Clips

The White House is looking to a coming battle with the pharmaceutical industry as an opportunity to bash the GOP for aligning with a powerful interest group and to burnish President Joe Biden’s populist credentials ahead of the 2024 presidential election. More: HuffPost

A total of 23 Florida counties have issued evacuation orders for their coastal cities and low-lying areas ahead of Hurricane Idalia's expected landfall tomorrow morning. More: NBC