6.19.24 Happy Juneteenth!

It’s Wednesday. Happy Juneteenth! There are 139 days until the general election.

Be advised: This newsletter cusses like Matt Gaetz has been investigated forever with jack shit happening so far. 

Note: Sexy Patriots! We’re not gonna bug you too much today. It’s an important federal holiday that we want to observe and celebrate, so we’re just doing an abbreviated version with about half as much cussing as usual. Today is Juneteenth, the day we celebrate the last emancipation of slaves in America, a conclusion to our nation’s most shameful chapter. It’s also a day when we wonder if they just skip this part of the calendar in Florida. 

We’re not gonna go on too long today, but we do want to make one thing very clear on this Juneteenth — Donald Trump is a racist piece of shit who surrounds himself with other racist pieces of shit and if they get back in the White House, they’re going to do lots of racist shitty things. Look, we’re not poets, but hopefully you know what we mean.  

So fuck those racist pieces of shit, and Happy Juneteenth. Y’all have a blessed day. 

Note two: Damnit. RIP Willie Mays. More: LA Mag

Note three: We love you, and we’ll see you tomorrow. 

Note four: Also, LOLOL…